Getting naked??

[neko_girl22]

hehe thought that title would get your attention.

I am talking about onsens. How do those of you who in live in Japan feel about getting naked in front of others?

I'm pretty lucky that here in Kagoshima they have "family onsens" so I go there regularly with my hubby.

but today I went to a beautiful "lotten" - outside onsen! The first time I went I had no problems stripping off, because the location is sooo secluded I thought not many people knew about this place. It feels really nice to be naked in such a beautiful setting .
Actually, I found out, it's very popular.
so.... today I went in a pair of my husbands boxers and a bra as there was one other man there. but, I felt really stupid. After a while I felt brave enough to go bra-less.:blush:

It's so beautiful there, so I'm definately going back, I just have to work up the courage to show perfect strangers my naked body hehe.....

How do you feel about onsens?

[Iron Chef]

Yeah, I felt more than a little awkward the first couple times. Somehow the public onsens with total strangers didn't bother me half as much as when I was with say a group of co-workers or people I knew. Ultimately, I learned to get over my own feelings of awkwardness and the occasional "Hey look! there's a nekkid gaijin in here!" gawker because they were ruining my relaxation experience.
:)

[sbgurly04]

Personally I found the onsens wonderful but still a little awkward especially when with people i knew. Then theres the little thing of having lovely grandmas point stare and laugh but hey its still mighty relaxing

[Sekabin]

Well I had my first onsen experience this spring in Izu, it was absolutley amazing once I'd got over the initial embarrassment. The most weird thing was that I wasn't embarrased about being naked, more the fact that this older Japanese guy (who looked like he spent all his days in the sun) was speaking in macho Japanese to me (who looks like a pasty white office boy) and had absolutely no clue what he was saying.

[mdchachi]

I don't think twice about it these days. The first few times I was a little self-conscious. I'm sure I'd be a lot more self-conscious if i were in a konyoku (mixed gender) onsen like what you're talking about it.

If you want us to help desensitize you, you can send all of us pictures of your naked body. ;)

[kirei_na_me]

I don't know if I could do it. I would love to soak in an onsen, but I have heard some horror stories from foreign women who say that people tried to photograph them and such. I believe I would have to find a nice, secluded one to go to before I go into one with lots of other people.

This brings me to the Japanese and their feelings toward nudity. It's perfectly fine to shed your clothes and get in an onsen in front of people you don't know, but to walk around in your own house nude is embarassing? For me, I think nothing of doing that sort of thing, but for most of the ones I know, they wouldn't get further than the bathroom door naked(well, you know what I mean). I know that the feeling they have is that you're meant to be naked in the bath, but not really meant to be so outside of the bath, but still...it's a strange way of thinking. It's always been a point of interest to me, I guess.

[mdchachi]

> I have heard some horror stories from foreign women who say that people tried to photograph them

This is highly unlikely to happen while in the bath. I mean, people don't bring valuables or cameras into the bath. Sounds suspiciously like urban legend to me. Or it may have happened to one person out of 10,000 or something like that.

> to walk around in your own house nude is embarassing

My spouse has no problem with this -- at least around the bedroom where there is no chance of being seen through a window.

[tasuki]

Ummm. I was raised in a pretty relaxed household, so I didn't have any problem with it from the get go, whether normal onsen or mixed onsen. I was more concerned about not doing something inappropriate than being naked...

Actually, in mixed onsens, most women wear a towel wrapped around their bodies while in the tub, while some men cover their privates with a hand towel. Of course older and/or less inhibited people still walk around and soak in the buff... There's nothing like a good soak in a onsen, naked... Kashikiriburo (private baths) are the best if you're with your significant other...

I agree with mdchachi, getting photographed in onsens is highly unlikely and in sento (public bathhouses) quite impossible as it's forbidden. I sure wouldn't want to damage my cell phone or digital camera with the high humidity of an onsen...

[neko_girl22]

Thanks tasuki for the tip about the towel! :wave:

Can you actually go IN the onsen with the towel? I felt soooo stupid in my bra and boxers.... luckily there was only one other man there - who only used the hand towel while walking around, not in the onsen. Poor guy - seemed more embarassed than me to meet a gaijin and left quite early.

Next time I go, I want to do what a Japanese girl would do - either go naked or wear a towel..........
(and bring PLENTY of bug spray)

In the meantime, I will continue to go to our private family onsens - only 400Y per hour!!!

[tasuki]

Yes, they do. I've heard confliciting opinions about how men should or shouldn't dip their wash towel (hand towel) in the actual onsen once they get in, but I've seen enough men getting in the bath with their privates covered to think that it's not a complete no-no. As far as women are concerned, well being a man... but you do see women do that in television shows involving onsen. So do men, now that I think of it. So it's probably not completely "forbidden". I've even heard of women going to konyoku onsen in their bathing suits...

[Sekabin]

in my onsen 'initiation' i was told not to dip the small towel into the water (because that's the towel you've just used to wash yourself prior to dipping). But this was some swanky outdoor thing - I have no idea about the regular public baths. Certainly I didn't see anyone do it in the onsens I went in.

I think the rumours about being photographed come from these outside baths rather than the covered inside ones (i.e people can take photos from above).

Regarding nudity - I find that weird too about the embarrassment in non-onsen situations...

[neko_girl22]

Hubby says yep, you shouldn't dip your towel in the onsen - especially in inside public ones.

He says I can do whatever I like at the lotten - togs, towel whatever......... but I don't want to look like a baka gaijin.... and yet it's difficult for me to totally strip off. Maybe a skin coloured G? ha ha....:blush:

The lotten is in the bush looking over a river. There is possibly someone living on the other side of the river because there is a bridge. I can't see anything, but I wouldn't be surprised if some kinky man was filming ...... I might be all over the internet by now hehe.....

[tasuki]

What's a lotten? Do you mean rotenburo--an outdoor bath at an onsen? If so, rotenburo etiquette is the same as for the indoor baths, although you can walk around covered if you want when your moving to and fro from bath to bath, just as you would indoors.

If I may make just one observation about nudity, unless women are completely different from men in that respect, I don't think people pay that much extra attention to foreigners in onsen (naked or not--actually, you're more likely to draw attention to yourself it you don't strip...). People are there to enjoy themselves and relax... Everybody's in the buff, so one more body doesn't make that much difference... Think of it as dancing at a club. Even though the first time around you're pretty self-conscious, you soon realize that the other people are too wrapped up in their own dancing to care much about yours or you about theirs... The person who doesn't dance but is still on he dance floor is the one who stands out...

[neko_girl22]

yep, lotten (or rotten - but that sounds bad heh) is rotenburo.... sometimes we just shorten it.

I know that you stand out if you don't strip that's why I'm working up the courage to do that next time. I was just wondering how other people dealt with it - especially women, but I don't think there are many on the forum who live in Japan.

this rotenburo is in the bush, next to a river and near to a beautiful waterfall (inukai no taki). It's really secluded. I can't wait to go in winter at night.... drinking sake......:happy:

[tasuki]

Careful not to drink too much, it can really go to your head since the water's so hot... :gulp:

Anyway, there are tons of foreign women living in Japan, just not that many on this forum. If you want, drop me a PM and I'll give you the address of another forum where a whole bunch of foreigners living in Japan hang out (actually, you may already be aware of it...)

[wasabikkuli]

Me and my wife are looking for a mix onsens around Hiratsuka, because we would like at least to be together when w ego, is anyone of you knows one
thanks

[blockhar]

i have been to an onsen once. i would of went more but i was busy and tired a lot. i live in hirakatashi, and it was okay. i was looked at a lot but i expected that, people admired my body. i got "sogoii and kakkoii" i was used to it. i went with an african friend and it was okay. i play football so i used to showering and being nude in front of others. But it was so relaxing. but i want to go to a mixed one. i think it would be totemo omoshiroi.

[AustinB]

I have heard that some onsens don't allow gajins, is this true? If so which are the main ones that have this policy?

[westsan]

I always cover my wing-ding with my towel.

-- but even then Japanese get all rubber necked :-D

[westsan]

Someday I would like to go to a swinging onsen!!!

[tasuki]

AustinB
That's mostly a thing of the past. I've been to numerous onsen and sentou during my time here and I've never been refused entrance once (and I went to some pretty far flung onsen...). That's one outdated misconception that still gets printed in travel books and online (although I'm not saying it NEVER happens)...

[mdchachi]

> I have heard that some onsens don't allow gajins, is this true? If so which are the main ones that have this policy?

True but very rare. Usually you'll find such policies in places where they have had problems with misbehaving foreigners at one time or other (such as the port cities in Hokkaido where Russian sailors are to be found). I have had countless onsen/sento experiences and have been around all of Japan and have never been turned away.

[blockhar]

i know some onsens dont allow tattoos, i know Spa world in Osaka doesnt. you have to cover it up or you are not allowed. I dont know the reason but that is their policy.

[Enfour]

I have been in a mixed rotenburo with some other friends and some old guys tried to have their photos taken with us. We told them that it was not approprate and that they were bothering us. "jama-shimasu ga....." with a dirty look on your face.

I love Onsens and try to go as often as possible to try out many different places.

When I know there is mixed bathing, I always take a sarong which lets you move about between baths with some modesty but allows you the full naked bathing experience underwater as the sarong floats on top.

[neko_girl22]

When I know there is mixed bathing, I always take a sarong which lets you move about between baths with some modesty but allows you the full naked bathing experience underwater as the sarong floats on top.

and you don't feel silly being the only one wearing something in the onsen?
I've also heard it's rude to put anything in the water - eg towel etc.
Next time I go, perhaps I will wear a towel / sarong as I move around, but peel off as I get in the onsen. The last thing I want to be is a baka gaijin, but........ coming from NZ and English parents, stripping off in front of others is not something I'm used to.... but, I suppose after a few times it will be not such a big thing.

Thanks Enfour for your post, it's nice to hear the experiences of another female :wave:

[Sekabin]

I think you'll get used to it after a few times. To be honest at first I felt a bit silly walking around with a tiny square towel in front of my groin... it seemed silly to be desparately trying to hide myself only to be completely naked in the bath... but then i noticed that it seemed to be the older men who didn't bother... and i didn't want to see old LOL!

[cacawate]

The sento I visited in Osaka was in a crazy Yakuza district called either Shinemameya or Shinimameya (can't remember). There was a man there who had tattoos covering his whole body. It was pretty neat. As for me being embarrassed, I was kinda tipsy so I didn't mind. And luckily too, I soon found out that people there really don't give a crap about who you are, or what color you are, because they're all about just relaxing. I think I had one guy, in all the onsen/sento I visited ask me where I was from. When I told him, he just grunted acknowledgement and went back to bathing.

The cool thing about the onsen I went to were that they had different bathing styles. Like the below-freezing-almost-ice-cold bath (If you're a westerner and aren't conscious about your little guy --which it WILL become that-- I suggest you try this), it's cold as all hell when you get in but somehow the shock (or the frost-bite) settles in and in comforting in a weird way. Speaking of "the shock" (great segway), there was one that had some sort of weird invisible electricity running though the water (you heard me) and, I guess, you're supposed to put your back to it and it'll help out back aches or what not. It was really strange, it felt horrible.... but, that's just to me. I'm sure there's someone out there you would like it. And the last one i went in (besides the regular ones) was the scalding-hot-hotspring-recreation bath, which is basically the same as the hot bath, just scalding. The funny thing with that one was me and my friend would see how tough we were by going in the ice-cold one and then into that one. Man, that messed me up.

Well, I've talked way too much. If you guys want I can elaborate on the Yakuza town in another thread (just start one with the name "crazy stories" or what ever. Or maybe I'll start my own) since a lot of weird stuff happened there in only three days. Anyways, thanks for listening to my crazy story telling.

-Jeff

[Sgt. Wang]

Well, my friend had a good experience at a split onsen, but I had the unfortunate experience of going to a konyoku onsen in what used to be called Shirane, but is now Minami-Alps. But after averting my eyes when every naked person came into view, I felt REALLYY relaxed. I mean, it was very soothing for my muscles and my skin and stuff. But there still were a lot of gawking Japanese ladies staring at my body. Sorta odd, but I've never felt so relaxed in my life.

[Loustic]

Hello Nzuenda,

- I have my doubts about the option of the sarong (also covers), because one of the purpose of being nude in an onsen is also hygenic. That is why we need to wash before entering into the water. So, bringer sarong into the water seems really not appropriate to me.
Even if some japanese does the same, I think it better to not bring anything on water.
Of course, sarong is nice to wander out of the water, but to my mind, it should be removed before entering despite I understand the issue of modesty.

- I some thread, I heard about the different conception about nudity in Japan and in Occident. But I also have big doubts about this : even in Western coutries, nudity is not seen with the same eyes in, for example, USA and Finland or Germanic countries. Plus, despite Japan has no substantial christianic history, the Confucean ideas (Edo period) have restricted the nudity, also has done the Meiji and Taisho government.
So, the comparison seems meaningless to me, and indeed very few young japanese go into konyoku.

:happy:

Read you all soon
Ludovic

PS: sorry for my bad english. This is not my mothertongue.

[neko_girl22]

Loustic, thanks for your reply. I , too, have come to understand the logic behind not wearing anything in an onsen.
Actually I have changed a lot since I first posted this thread. Just last week I went to the Kirishima mountains with my husband and visiting friends and had a great time at an onsen resort. Since I was the only female in our group I enjoyed the public onsen by myself. I loved the doro (mud) onsen! and I had the chance to chat with a few of the other women in the onsen. I feel completely relaxed walking around naked now :happy: whereas I saw a young Japanese woman using a towel to cover up in between pools.
In the end I felt it wasn't worth all the effort trying to cover up, better that I just get over it and fit in! The first few times were a bit awkward, but now I am an onsen lover for life!

[Loustic]

Nzueda,
Thanks for your reply.

In Roma, do as roman does...

I know it is not so easy. I have been only once in an onsen, and only in a man-only bath. I was not at ease at all in the beginning, but it was early in the morning and I was the first one. So, I entered the water and have full time to look at other comers (Japanese) and study their behavior. After a while, I copied them and did not bother to hide myself behind the the small towel so much. (In fact, the habit seems to be to hide himself, but not to take care so much of hiding it a any price).
Someone here told, "I do not want to see old ....", but well, there is no need to look at, I guess.

I have never experiment a konyoku. I guess that since I was embarrassed in a man bath, I will be much more in a mixed one, but I will go on respecting the rule "in Rome do as roman do".

I think there is another point also, esp. in a mixed onsen : If someone wears something, it may sound odd for people in the nude. This should be a deal, a exchange, otherwise it increases the sexual impact.
If I were nude in a konyoku, and if a girl entered wearing a sarong, a big towel, a swimming suit, I would be embarrassed by my own nudity.
If she weared a towel, perhaps I would have the tendency to look at her, to see what she did not entended me to see, and this would bring some erotic tension in the air.
If she were nude, I will probably notice her, if she were beautiful, but quickly consider her as somthing different as a "nude body". Dificult to explain, but the more nude you are, the less sexual it is.


However, I think it is still a bit weird in my mind to go to a konyoku with some girl friends. With a girl friend, yes, with strangers yes, but friend girls of mine... it may so much change the image I have of her...?

Do you experiment going to a kon'yoku with some friends ? Does it change the relationships?

Best regards

Ludovic

[Gaijinian]

I'm reviving a ghost, sorry...

I have experienced an ofuro, but actually think I was less stared at than usual (maybe it was because I did not have my "Nippon" hachimaki...).

Anyway, a strange experience for me was my host brother (who was 8) wanted to take a bath together. This may have been THE most foreign part of the entire trip, but I eventually reluctantly agreed.

It was not as strange as I thought it might be, but such an act in The West, The US, at least, is pretty taboo... But it did not seem too strange to kid kid, nor did it to his family, so hey...

[Kinsao]

Ooohh, I thought this thread title is really interesting, but now I can't contribute because I have never been to an onsen! :gomen: I feel so useless..... do you want to hear about other 'getting naked' experiences instead? :hihi:

[Gaijin 06]

I went to an onsen to Ginza, believe it or not. Most Japanese don't know it exists (none that I spoke to). It is a tiny place, only 400 yen entry and two little pools per gender.

Very good though, and I didn't feel at all out of place, even amongst the (mainly quite old) Japanese guys. My girlfriend in the other side said the same thing. She didn't realise the little old lady overseeing both sides swapped for a middle aged bloke half way through though!

I didn't feel at all nervous in naked front of all the Japanese, as they didn't show any signs of "rubber necking" or gawking.

[Mars Man]

I noticed the title yesterday, as it was at the right of the general forum display, and thought the wording interesting ( not necessarily because of the adjective, however) but didn't bother to open it.

I have many a good experience in the hot springs around this area, and there are some pretty good ones. I think some very good examples have been given here about the concept involved in bathing in one, and there probably is nothing I can really add, I don't guess.

I love the open air baths, and agree that the naturistic approach is very relaxing and fulfilling--totally unconnected with eroticism (although there can be a certain tension until one is used to the freedom of having a body as is. One thing that I've not done yet, which I hope to some day, is to sit there in one of the rotenburos, snow all lightly packed all around on the rocks, hand towel on head, sipping that almost hot sake slowly while the little boat floats nearby with another refill awaiting. Heaven !! If some fine male or female were to slip in with me, we could both enjoy it in the fellowship of pure nature without any hangups or thoughts other than the joy of the hot spring and sake itself.

I have had friends who have come to visit from the states, including my father, who would simply not go to one, from the fear of being nude. That's really a shame. I strongly feel that there should be more separation between our real selves, as we are, and the act of sex--there is an extra plane for the latter, above the former.

I just love the onsen, though...I wish I had one in my back yard, and who knows, I could build one some day. And as for myself, Kinsao san, I'd love to hear about other experiences of physical freedom; I can't speak on behalf of the others though. :nihonjin:

[Chipi]

I'm just building my courage, since me & my (Japanese) boyfriend are visiting Japan again, a couple of weeks later. We are going to go to an onsen with his also Japanese friends - so I'll be the only gaijin there, and the only person to never have been to an onsen.

I actually suprised myself, about how much I am freaking out about getting natural infront of other people! I am from Finland and going to sauna is an allmost daily thing for us.
So I'll have to get naked with strange women AND men in a mixed onsen OR go to the women only onsen with women I've never met before and try to find the right way to behave there (don't know the onsen "rules" etc)? Especially because there will be a group of people, who all are my boyfriends friends. Of course on the time I meet them the first time, I'd love to leave a good impression of me, and I am afraid of making a complete fool out of myself and through that also embarrass my boyfriend... ("such a dumbass gaijin girlfriend you've got..")
The difference between sauna and onsen is, that usually men and women bathe separately, unless they are a family, and also if foreigners are going to sauna for the first time(s), they are usually offered the option to wear a bathing suit or towel to the sauna. If they do, so will the rest of the bathing people do. Also some women might feel insecure without _any_ kind of makeup and clothes infront of new/strange people. I have to confess I have that problem sometimes.. In Finland no-one is going to stop you from wearing a bit of waterproof mascara etc. to sauna if you want to. In JapanI think it would be out of the question and even I think it's rude. So somehow I'm afraid of showing absolutely everything of me, the whole package, to strangers but especially the new friends. It's like letting people judge you without any kind of protecting "shield" if you needed it... huh? I am allready conscious about being different in appearance(..being "kinpatsu" gaijin..), so being different in appearance AND being naked at the same time against a group of people is somehow frightening to me.

The women who have already been to onsen, and had similar fears and reasons for being nervous, did you get over it very soon or did you have to go to onsen many times before you could completely relax?
I just hope to get over my silly stupid fears and have a fabulous time together with everyone I'll meet.. :kanashii:

[Kyoto Returnee]

I'm just building my courage, since me & my (Japanese) boyfriend are visiting Japan again, a couple of weeks later.

"My Japanese boyfriend and I"

[Chipi]

"My Japanese boyfriend and I"

.. and the point of your comment? If it was to correct a language mistake I think it was quite inappropriate - I'm not english, this is not a forum for or about english or english people only..

[Kyoto Returnee]

.. and the point of your comment? If it was to correct a language mistake I think it was quite inappropriate - I'm not english, this is not a forum for or about english or english people only..

My sincerest. I will take it all back..:cool:

[pipokun]

I've never met before and try to find the right way to behave there (don't know the onsen "rules" etc)?
I am sure that they will be pleased to tell you the rules.

Also some women might feel insecure without _any_ kind of makeup
How about wearing lighter makeup when you meet them?

[Annubis]

My 5th or 6th day in Japan, I was staying in a Ryokan in Shinjuku. The woman of the house gave me a ticket to go to the public bath just down the street. I was extremely interested. As a matter of fact before coming to Japan I fancied working in one as maintenance staff. I had been maintenance staff in a public shower of a country club in canada, so I figured maybe I could do the same when I arrived in Japan... hehe... I loke those kinda down to earth jobs from time to time. So I had professionally seen women naked before. I also went to one of the outdoor onsens in Hokkaido at night with the stars and snow. It was amazing.

As for an onsen for men and women, I would have no qualms for that either. I had been drawing naked people since I was 14 years old. I went to a special art high school. And Hanlan's Point in Toronto is a nude beach... hehe.. I went there once with my ex-boyfriend.

Nudity is the most natural state of being, expressing beauty and vulnerability.

[Glenski]

For those of you who are embarrassed to strip down in front of the same gender, how do you feel about visiting a sports gym in your own country and using the shower or sauna there? Just curious.

[centrajapan]

i dont like sentos. onsens can be ok. the outside one and stuff but i dont find sentos to be hygenic. you sit on those plastic stools which everyone has been sitting on... i prefer taking baths at home. i prefer the japanese style ofuro rooms than western where the toilet is in the same room as the shower and bath tub.

i have never been to a mixed onsen. i have never ben to a nude beach. there are quite few of those here. if the girls were hot i think id get horny and be afraid to get a stiffy. maybe id just walk around with an erection as that too is perfectly natural. if i keep going back to the same onsen with an erection maybe the people working there or people who frequently visits that onsen will simply call me the stiffy. oi, there is stiffy. how are you stiffy? i am fine. thanks.

[Skuu]

Well if everyone's naked and half submerged I doubt it would be a problem. Humans have a habit of being able to do anything as long as lots of other people are doing it. When I go to the gym I'm embarrassed about getting naked in the changing room 'cause there's usually only a few other guys. But if there was a bunch of people about it would be OK. I'm quite content about my body.

[ArmandV]

if the girls were hot i think id get horny and be afraid to get a stiffy. maybe id just walk around with an erection as that too is perfectly natural. if i keep going back to the same onsen with an erection maybe the people working there or people who frequently visits that onsen will simply call me the stiffy. oi, there is stiffy. how are you stiffy? i am fine. thanks.

Just think about the food you hate the most or the saddest thing in your life. If that doesn't work, smack it against the wall.

[kameron]

i have never been to a mixed onsen. i have never ben to a nude beach. there are quite few of those here. if the girls were hot i think id get horny and be afraid to get a stiffy. maybe id just walk around with an erection as that too is perfectly natural. if i keep going back to the same onsen with an erection maybe the people working there or people who frequently visits that onsen will simply call me the stiffy. oi, there is stiffy. how are you stiffy? i am fine. thanks.

hehe :blush:

perhaps fire off a few knuckle-children before you go
:relief:

[Skuu]

smack it against the wall.

Lol, what's wrong with you?

[Glenski]

i dont find sentos to be hygenic. you sit on those plastic stools which everyone has been sitting on... .
And, just what do you do at an onsen? Stand in the shower?

[bakaKanadajin]

i have never been to a mixed onsen. i have never ben to a nude beach. there are quite few of those here. if the girls were hot i think id get horny and be afraid to get a stiffy. maybe id just walk around with an erection as that too is perfectly natural. if i keep going back to the same onsen with an erection maybe the people working there or people who frequently visits that onsen will simply call me the stiffy. oi, there is stiffy. how are you stiffy? i am fine. thanks.

Actually you'd probably be banned from going to that onsen since most men can to a certain degree manage to make the involuntary boner an exception and not the norm. I hope you sit at a desk for your day job, if you were a crossing guard or something I'd feel bad for you.

[Kyoto Returnee]

i dont like sentos. onsens can be ok. the outside one and stuff but i dont find sentos to be hygenic. you sit on those plastic stools which everyone has been sitting on... i prefer taking baths at home. i prefer the japanese style ofuro rooms than western where the toilet is in the same room as the shower and bath tub.

i have never been to a mixed onsen. i have never ben to a nude beach. there are quite few of those here. if the girls were hot i think id get horny and be afraid to get a stiffy. maybe id just walk around with an erection as that too is perfectly natural. if i keep going back to the same onsen with an erection maybe the people working there or people who frequently visits that onsen will simply call me the stiffy. oi, there is stiffy. how are you stiffy? i am fine. thanks.


That's pretty darn gross mate!

Onsens REALLY are not for that sort of person so definitely do not go.

[Skuu]

Perfectly normal. Just shrug it off. But don't stare at women (or men) or you might offend them.

[Chipi]

For those of you who are embarrassed to strip down in front of the same gender, how do you feel about visiting a sports gym in your own country and using the shower or sauna there? Just curious.

I used to hesitate to strip down even with the same gender in gyms/sauna etc. That was mostly because I wasn't that happy or confident about my body. Now that I'm older I simply accept me and my lumps or my un-lumps (;)) as they are, and really don't care about what happens in the dressing room of a gym or sauna or so. I think it's also because I've seen so many different kinds of female bodies and upreciate and respect the variety - I'm just one of them. In a way it's the same for me to see a male body - it's "just" a body, and I'm used to going to sauna with my family for example.

But there's something different here, of me going to Japan, getting naked infront of my bf and his friends and their girlfriends. I am somehow way too conscious of me, and the flaws I think I have, the differences my body has compared to theirs etc. It is grately because I am the only gaijin there.. and I have always just admired the beauty of the Japanese. I will feel so ugly.. I am terrified of what they will think of me etc, especially because I am meeting these people for the first time! It sounds really superficial and ridiculous but I just can't help it, and am scared my stressing will ruin the experience for me.

But, apparently there's is no turning back now - If I have understood right our onsen trip is allready planned and sorted out :P
So, maybe, just maybe, I'll share my experiences in this thread after I'm back from Japan in 2,5 weeks ;) I will try to be brave!

[Glenski]

But there's something different here, of me going to Japan, getting naked infront of my bf and his friends and their girlfriends. I am somehow way too conscious of me, and the flaws I think I have, the differences my body has compared to theirs etc. It is grately because I am the only gaijin there.. and I have always just admired the beauty of the Japanese. I will feel so ugly.. I am terrified of what they will think of me etc, especially because I am meeting these people for the first time! It sounds really superficial and ridiculous but I just can't help it, and am scared my stressing will ruin the experience for me.
I completely understand, Chipi.

Perhaps one way to reduce your stress for this upcoming event is to contact the other people of your gender, introduce yourself through email or phone, and explain briefly your feelings of discomfort. Then, ask them straight out what they plan to do. It may be on their minds as well, and you might have a pleasant surprise in learning what they feel is necessary to hide those private parts.

Best of luck.

[joaniedark]

Well, I haven't been yet, but I'm going to go visit several onsens with my family this fall when we go to Japan. I honestly don't think I'd have too much of a problem with being naked in front of everyone, it'll probably be my father pitching a fit...:emblaugh:
Overall, I just think of nudity as natural, so I see no problem with running around like that.

[Chipi]

..Haha, I have to tell this after everything I have written.. boy did we laugh :)

We had a long chat about the onsens yesterday, and were also checking some websites.I was really stressed about it, and because of that, I also started to make my boyfriend stressed and annoyed. After talking about it for a long time, my boyfriend finally took pen and paper and made a chart for me of the different typesof onsen...
All this time I have thought that the majority of the onsen are the Konyoku-type onsen where men and women bathe together in the same "pool". And I also had the impression in my mind that we (us and my boyfriend's friends) are going to go to onsen just like that. And from that drawing and from his explanation I finally got it! It's going to be only me&my boyfriend in the same pool, or/and me and the female friends of his. Not me and his male friends in the same pool. So it was all just a big misunderstanding!
Why it happened, is a long and complicated story but culminates to my question " so do men and women bathe together naked in a mixed onsen?" Of course my bf answered "yes", because that's the way it is. He just didn't realise that I didn't realise we are NOT going to go to one of those, because I didn't know about the different types of onsen :) (i had the image of there being 2 kinds of them, private ones and then the one "big" onsen)
My stupidity really,for not really finding information about onsen myself as well. But oh how I'm relieved! Now I can't wait to go! Just a lesson for all of you as well; always find more information before you make any conclusions ,and in "mixed-culture" relationships, always be more patient and keep in mind that there might be some misunderstandings ;)

If you guys want I could post some onsen links here. And I will try to remember to tell my onsen experience here after I go there :)

...and sorry for the long moaning and whining..

[Glenski]

After talking about it for a long time, my boyfriend finally took pen and paper and made a chart for me of the different typesof onsen...
All this time I have thought that the majority of the onsen are the Konyoku-type onsen where men and women bathe together in the same "pool". Smacking myself (and you) on the forehead. No, no, no, no, no, no...


And I also had the impression in my mind that we (us and my boyfriend's friends) are going to go to onsen just like that. And from that drawing and from his explanation I finally got it! It's going to be only me&my boyfriend in the same pool, or/and me and the female friends of his. Not me and his male friends in the same pool. So it was all just a big misunderstanding!Isn't is fun to actually communicate about things instead of worrying about them in private? I have yet to convince my wife of that merit, but here is a prime exampe. Glad things seem to have worked out.

Just a lesson for all of you as well; always find more information before you make any conclusions ,and in "mixed-culture" relationships, always be more patient and keep in mind that there might be some misunderstandings An excellent take-home message. Pretty much what is in a whole book devoted to intercultural marriages that I read. Excellent book, too, even if only for the many real-life examples it has of poor communication.

[JAL]

Nothing is more beautiful than a naked humans body, don 't hide beauty! Be proud of it. Don't be ashamed. This should encourage people? I guess not.

[suz135]

I go to the onsens where the women and men are separated. I still feel a little self-conscious but its worth it. I love onsens!